
Picture by Cláudia Back
A friend told me recently that I needed more “main character” energy. That it’s okay, even essential, to be the most important person in my own life. Not more important than anyone else, but just as important as.
And honestly? That concept blew me away.
I hadn’t realised how far I’d drifted from that idea. That somehow, somewhere, I’d made peace with putting myself at the bottom of the list, and didn’t even notice I’d done it.
Why talk about this in a beauty blog?
Because for me, beauty has become less about appearance and more about self-compassion. About showing up for myself with the same love and care I’d show a friend. And that shift, that mindset, is what I want to share here.
I’m in my mid-forties (still mid for a few more days), and I’ve learned that if anyone’s going to truly nurture me, it has to start with me.
Whether it’s ten minutes of skincare, a quiet moment with a body oil I love, or choosing to wear lipstick just because it makes me feel powerful, it’s not about being “done up.” It’s about feeling present. Grounded. Me.
Self-care isn’t just beauty routines. But…
I’ve said it before, and it’s worth repeating. Self-care is not just about skincare and makeup. It’s about a whole approach to wellbeing; what we eat, how we sleep, when we rest, how we move, what we say yes to and when we say no.
That said, sometimes those little daily rituals; the shower, the serum, the morning make-up, can become small acts of resistance. Of renewal. Of you time.
Mental health and the missing morning routine
Stephen Buckley from Mind (or at least someone who sounds wise) once said, “When you’re experiencing a mental health problem, personal care and daily routines can stop feeling like a priority.”
And wow, do I feel that when I am not on top form.
When I’m low or depleted, the idea of doing my skincare or makeup can feel overwhelming. But I also know that when I do it anyway, when I go through the motions with a bit of intention, I often feel 100 times better. Not just because I look different, but because I showed up for myself.
It’s not a mask. It’s not hiding. Although I will admit when facing a challenging day at work, it sometimes did feel like war paint. Sometimes it’s a hug or an act of appreciation for myself. Always, it’s a choice.
Beauty and the broken mirror
We live in a world that sells us a very narrow, often harmful version of beauty. And honestly? I’m not here for it.
My husband, a wonderful human, often says he prefers me without makeup, and I believe him. But that’s not the point. I don’t put on mascara or lip tint to impress anyone else. I do it because sometimes, it feels good. And it’s a way of saying yes, we are going out and that matters to me, I want to feel special. It’s a celebration of me, or even us.
When I discovered Tropic’s build-your-own makeup palette and realised I could create something that suited me, for me, no colours that don’t work, no money wasted. Bespoke to me! That was and still is, pretty cool.
Water signs and shower spells
As a true water sign, I find deep healing in water. Whether it’s washing away the day or waking myself up for a fresh start, water works for me.
I don’t always have time for a long bath, but a mindful shower? That I can manage.
Adding a body wash that smells like heaven, or a shampoo that wakes up my senses, is a game-changer.
Tropic’s bath oils, cleansing pebbles, and especially the Energising Bergamot, Eucalyptus and Black Pepper body wash (which I’m officially stealing from the “for men” section), are staples in my bathroom. Not because I sell them, though I do, but because I love them.
And when I have a little more time, I love extending that care beyond the shower. A whipped body moisturiser that melts into the skin, there’s something so nurturing about smoothing soft textures onto tired skin, almost a meditation in itself.
Also the parts of us we often neglect; hands and feet, they work hard, and deserve a little love too. A nourishing foot balm, or even just massaging in hand cream can feel like an act of gratitude. Like saying thank you to my body.
Whatever you do, it doesn’t have to be complicated. Just a few quiet moments with your favourite scent, soft textures, and a little intention.
And when I need a full reset? A face mask, a herbal tea, and a deep breath does wonders. It’s not about fixing anything. It’s about creating a pause, unwinding, there is no performance in it, just restoration. Tuning in to me and tuning out to everything else.
Final thoughts, from me to me (and maybe you)
For me, this isn’t about “beauty.” It’s about treating myself with tenderness and intention. It’s about nurturing body, mind, and spirit, even when I don’t feel like it. Especially then.
So take the time, if you can. Light the candle. Use the good oil. Wear the lip colour that makes you feel fierce. Not because you need fixing, but because you deserve care.
And if you’re curious about the Tropic products I’ve mentioned, feel free to check out my website, or connect with me on Facebook or Instagram. No pressure, just sharing what works for me.
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